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kingdumb Hearts BBS 1B

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And here's part 2.
Reuploaded since there was an error just now.

Right, my usual Satarical analysis of the game.
For part 1, let's take a look at the main characters and why I portrayed them as I did:

Ventus:
You'd think he's the main main hero, looking like Roxas and always being in the center of all the official art, but he has the least to do in the story. He's not a keyblade master, doesn't get an official mission, and basically wanders around aimlessly in search for friends.
And everytime he becomes friends with whatever Disney characters he ran into, he immediatly ditches them to search for new friends. Idiot or clever parody of our Myspace generation? You decide.
Considering his main purpose in the story is to be the woobie; cute, cudly and confused, and constantly crunched by misfortunate and tragedy, I decided to portray him as a naieve puppy.

Terra:
He's the representetive of darkness and EVIL in our main trio.
Together with Aqua, he's send on a mission to recover Master Xenahort and find out where the heartless...Sorry, the unversed came from.
Aqua and Terra do this by setting up efficient searches, establish communication with each other and the disney planets and carefully reconstructing the events that..

Hahahaha, sorry, I mean, they bicker and mistrust each other, never talk, kill the local Disney bullies and wander around aimlessly. However, Xenahort himself calls up Terra and practially gives the entire solution of his entire mission right on a silver platter. Terra uses this information to immediatly toss it in the garbage, become Xenahort's apprentice, which means he has to wonder aimlessly some more on disney planets. Whoo, exciting story eh kids?

Terra is supposed to be close to the dark side and naieve and stupid, but in honosty, he isn't all that more dark and stupid then, say, Sora would be. His only flaw is that he has the misfortunate of always getting the main Disney villain as the first character he runs into each Disney planet.
Tough even then, he rarely immediatly follows their orders.
The only dark/stupid things he does is randomly release Dr. Jumba from prison, and almost kill Eraqus during a heated debate, altough Eraqus, the supposedly light, calm and light mentor, isn't behaving all that much better.

As a result, I portray Terra relatively straight in these parodies. It's mostly how other people react to him that's bothering me then his own behaviour.

Aqua:
She's the light character of the trio.
Suprisingly, in the overall story, she has the most important part. However, that's only in the third act, in the first 2 acts, so does nothing but run after Terra and Ventus while not even coming close to solving the mission she's supposedly off to. But still, wow, only 7 games into this franchise and we finally get the first true female character that isn't useless. Hooray!


I have to admit, the way I portray her in the parody is more what I had in mind for Eraqus, who's stance on light and Darkness really bothers me for a guy who's so obsessed with "balance between light and darkness". But I'll get back to that in the next lecture..
Anyway, I have to play Eraqus straight for story reasons, so Aqua inherits his bad behaviour. She's his main apprentise after all, and she DID crash into Cinderella's house to kill Tremaine for not letting Cinderella go to the ball. (Yes, Tremaine and the step sisters even get KILLED OFF in this game, WTF.)

Master Xenahort:
Not much to say here. He's the only villain in Kingdom Hearts so far who ever manages to DO SOMETHING, so that makes him the best villain yet. Not that that's saying much.
I loved it when I read in his reports that he sent letters to Eraqus to convince him he changed his ways and is a nice guy now.
Then look at the opening scenes where he's constantly having this huge evil grin on his face. Yet getting angry at Vanitas for almost blowing his cover. Hahahaha.

Ansem: He barely had a cameo in the original game, but in the parody I'll give him and the gang some more screentime, since I use organisation XIII as a frame story.
Haha, I love how these "scientists" base all their research on an abstract concept.

Prince Phillip: Heh, my portrayel of Phillip as a passive idiot has nothing to do with Phillip himself, it's about how Kingdom Hearts loves to throw the Disney heroes in a corner of their own stories all the time. This was especially facepalm worthy in Lion King where Simba's big dramatic return to Pride rock was mostly Sora and Pete talking, with Simba and Scar just standing around in the background.
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